1) We were supposed to go to San Fransisco in December to attend a scientific project, but I could not attend. I paid for the air tickets, he paid for the hotel. He told me he will give me back the money for the air by the end of December, but when that time came he said there was some issues with his funds and I have to wait until January.
2) In January he told me he borrowed money from his sister and he has lost his funds (bad investment). So, I gave him $2300.00 to give back to his sister (he boroweed from her 5500), when I was in not stable financial situation but still I had some money saved.
3) I paid his lawyer the fee in February, because he had to extend his touristic visa
4) I added him in my phone plan, but I have never received any money from him for the phone. He just said he will add the money for the bill towards his loan.
5) He said he will start giving me part of the money in March. March came and he said he is experiencing problems, he will give me the money probably later. But he said he returned the rest of the money to his sister and he is paying her a rent (they live together). Ok, why you are not paying your phone bill?
6) It is the end of April and still I did not hear from him when he is going to make any payment to me. He is not mentioning anything.
My question is, should I sit down and talk with him and say what is going up with these money and your situation? I know he has some financial issues, but so do I. And I love him and I do not want to push him or make him think I do not understand him. But, I trhink what he did is wrong.
Any suggestions, what should I do? Much appreciated!Money loan to a boyfriend - how to ask for my money back?
Sounds like he isn't too bright on managing money. Never borrow to invest unless you have a positive alternate plan to repay if you loose your butt! If he is someone you plan to spend the rest of your life with, i.e. marry, and you know he feels likewise, Have a serious talk with him. Tell him you loaned him the money because you had it but, your situation has changed. You can't afford any more bailouts and any amount of repayment would be appreciated. If he disappears, you can pretty much figure he was just using you - which is what it sounds like to me. If he isn't a citizen be prepared for him to ';go home'; and forget all about you and what he owes you.Money loan to a boyfriend - how to ask for my money back?
Good luck - and thanks for the rating.
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Stop giving him money.
Yes, sit down and ask him about it.
Push - he is taking advantage of you.
have u thought that he is just using u for money, also are u having sex with him, well he will probably never pay you back, stop the sex and tell him until he pays u back no more sex. did u sign an agreement for him to pay u back? if so take him to small claims court and u should get ur money back
If this is how you are starting out your relationship, you will have a very difficult time going forward. I have been to this wall several times and now have a relationship with someone who is good with their money. Life is much, much better. To continue giving this person money is reinforcing his behavior and he will never pay you back. It is time to confront and resolve this problem or I would suggest for you to move on.
First, stop giving him money. You should have stopped back in January when he hadn't paid back the first amount he owed you. Yes, you should sit down and talk to him. Do you have him sign a promissory note for any of the amounts? You can sue him in small claims court if he refuses to pay you back; however, you have to prove that these were actually loans and a promissory note goes a long way (but it's not required, just guarantees that he acknowledges he owes the money). If you can when you sit down to talk with him, write up a payment plan with him and both of you sign that sheet of paper (make sure it's dated as well).
If he refuses to make an effort to pay you, then you may need to break up with him. You don't want to be in a relationship with someone that financially irresponsible, and with someone that you can't trust. In addition, do not give him any more money because you might not see what you've already given him again.
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